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Sunday, May 14, 2006

Steven Spielberg to make film about the Entebbe rescue



Fresh from his film Munich about the Israeli response to the Munich massacre, Spielberg is set to film the story of the Israeli rescue attempt at Entebbe Airport saving the passengers of a plane seized by PLO and German terrorists and diverted to Uganda.

Unlike previous films about Entebbe which focused on the heroism of the IDF and the rescue of the hostages from the terrorists, Spielberg will be reteaming with Tony Kusher for a more angst-ridden take on the events in question.

Based on the book 'How I Was An Israeuli Commando And Blew Up Stuff' by Georgi Rasmanoff, who initially claimed to be a former Israeli colonel but was in actuality revealed to be an out of work Russian Taxi driver, Spielberg promises that his movie will reimagine the Entebbe rescue as it had never been seen before. While critics are already pointing to technical errors in the script such as Golda Meir being played by a man and Yitzchak Rabin being assasinated decades too early in the closing act, Spielberg insists that once again his real goal is to tell a story that will force a new understanding among Israelis about fighting terrorists.

"I wasn't out to make a movie about soldiers rescuing hostages from evil terrorists," said Spielberg. "If I had wanted to do that, it would be no different than a Chuck Norris movie. Instead the protagonist, Goergi goes on a spirtual journey of sorts. He starts out believing that he can take his weapon and rescue some hostages and then comes to realize the complete futility of actually rescuing the hostages."

Authored by gay left-wing radical Tony Kusher who has no screenwriting experience whatsoever, the screenplay is said to be four hours long and features extended scenes of Georgi sleeping with his wife intercut with hostage rescues, three ballroom dancing scenes, a half hour of Georgi crying in the bathroom at the futility of life and climactic a meeting between the Israeli commandos and the PLO terrorists in which the PLO terrorists fully articulate their grievances and reveal their homosexual crushes for each other.

"Radical extemists right wing Jews failed to understand my message with Munich and lambasted me with a hatefull poisonous campaign but this time they can't fail to get my message," said Spielberg. "Terrorism is bad but so is fighting terrorism. All we can possibly do when confronted with terrorism is climb under our desks and throw hundred dollar bills at them from our wallets until they go away, just like I do with my gardener."

Tentatively titled, 'Entebbe - Sometimes You Just Gotta Give Up' will be coming to theaters soon.

4 comments:

Keliata said...

Great satire SK.

If Spielberg is STILL claiming that he wanted to be fair to both sides of the Munich massacre (innocent athletes and terrorists) he is either outright lying or delusional. As I was watching Munich I kept thinking in my mind that the context of trying to garner sympathy for the Palestinians fighting for a homeland was included as a qualifier to mitigate his real message--that Israel should be whiped off the face of the earth so that the Palestinians could have a homeland.

Of course nobody mentions that they can have a home in any of the Arab/Islamic nations in the Middle East. Or if they chose to live in peace and want the freedom of living in a democracy--there is Israel.

Freedom Fighter for good guy said...

As a gay man and a former PLO member I wish to protest your vile denounciation of this good man on this extremist website.
I fought proudly along the sides of my brothers in a combat of many years.
This is the times what I stood by to see their strong bodies covered in sweat their muscles rippling under their shirts as they stood up for the side of good guys in all the whole wide world.
when we was taking the Achille Lauro ship you think we were not doing work of good?
the UN people call us thugs
and refer to our glorious leader as gun toting yasser arafat.
we dont reconnize this kind of talk .
Yasser was a loving man.
You think all us gay men are whimp?
you just remember all your base belong to us you find feathered friend.
All Jooze is terriors!!!

farouk said...

Why now the US want to dominate capitalizm gains? why the american stael gass from arabian man?
why isreal try to put laundry soap in the fountain of Yasmina Abdullah's home? Millin of babul come out from this water on her and cover the front of hous with them. why isrel do this?
why isrel guys put all the time put empty cans on lawn of saudi embassordoor? why they call my house and ask if I put prince albert in a can? Why I would do somting this way you can tell me this? you big shoot know it all y ou think isrel so nice why they steal the hole big middle east and now arab all got no home to go.
now we beg in street of pakistan and soon all arab got to move to china from no land in middle eeast for us now any more.
why isrel takes all this hundreds of lands and leeve not thing for a couple poor arab peoeples to live on by?
I cry like water each day for poor of saudi arabia and i cry for myself with buble in front yard of home of yasmina nice girl do nothing wrong to harm isrel just she blow up bussses a few time.

Keliata said...

What gives with the last two posts? I'm confused.

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